USJ 25th Anniversary – Part 4 - Visiting our Neighbors

 March 28, 2026 – Part 2

We returned to our room and got ready to catch the train to Takarazuka, where we had lived while we were in Japan.

Coming down in the elevator, a family got on. They had two boys. The younger one was dressed as Mario in blue overalls, red shirt, and big red Mario hat. The older boy was dressed as Harry Potter, complete with the robe, Gryffindor scarf, and round, black-rimmed glasses. He looked enough like the character to have played him. Yes, seeing their excitement reminded us why we spent close to three years building the park.

Our plan for the first day was to see our dear friend and neighbor, Misayo Igo, her daughter, Kazue, and her boyfriend, Takehiro Shigematsu.

We met Misayo-san and her husband, Akira, on the day in 1998 when we first looked at our mansion and decided it would be our home. (Those who have read our book, 31 Months in Japan: The Building of a Theme Park, will be familiar with her.) They owned a restaurant called Burger City just down the hill from our building. We were on our way to the airport to go home, and we needed to eat lunch. So, we stopped there.

Our relocation coordinator, Teri, told them we would be living in the building up the hill.

Misayo declared we would be friends. She wanted to learn English, and I wanted to learn Japanese. While we lived there, I spent quite a bit of time in the shop. I had my English-Japanese dictionary, and she had her Japanese-English one. But we didn’t rely on them. She used to describe it as communicating “heart to heart.” (Google Translate used the word “telepathy.”) We made lots of mistakes and laughed a great deal, but it made little difference. She was right. We did become good friends.

As soon as we knew we would be in Japan again, I contacted her. (Kazue is our translator.) Misayo always wants to set a date immediately for us to come for lunch.

So, this would be our first excursion on this visit.

We bought our train tickets and took the familiar route from the park to Takarazuka on three different trains. Fortunately, we had gone this way many times. However, some of the landmarks had changed. Only a few remained.

We got off at the JR Takarazuka Station—a new one since we lived there. We’d seen it two years ago and were amazed at the transformation.

As pre-arranged, Takehiro and Kazue picked us up in his car and drove us to the Igos’ condo. (We could have taken the bus, but they offered, so we agreed.) They live in the building right below ours, and we’d visited them often. We “shared” holidays with them. They joined us for the U.S. ones, and we joined them for the Japanese ones.

We entered, and Kazue called out to let her mother know we had arrived. She bustled out of the kitchen, ran to me with her arms open wide, and we hugged. It was as if no time had passed. We were once again best friends, and we were together.

Kazue had said we would go to a noodle shop for lunch because Misayo had prepared everything for shabushabu for dinner. Obviously, she wanted us to spend the entire day, and we were all for it!

We gave them the gifts we had brought. I had found a special scarf at Mission San Juan Capistrano. It had the swallows on it. We also gave them a copy of our book, Jewel of the Missions: San Juan Capistrano, because it is illustrated with beautiful paintings showing the mission.

They were delighted with these as well as the candle and Trader Joe’s bag.

She brought us a cup of tea, and we reminisced about all the good memories we had shared. I recalled going to Burger City and said how sad I was that it was gone. I also mentioned that her udon noodles were still my very favorite in the world. Next thing we knew, she had jumped up and started cooking them! Most udon noodles are cooked in fish broth. I don’t care for fish. She made hers in a vegetable broth, and they tasted fresh and really yummy!

So, instead of going to a noodle shop, we had Misayo’s udon right there.

I asked Kazue about her health. She had written that she’d had cancer, but that she was doing okay. Two years earlier, she had been diagnosed with uterine cancer. She had gone through chemotherapy and surgery. Her follow-up scans had been free of cancer cells. However, not long ago, her scan showed the cancer had returned. She was now doing two hours of chemotherapy three times a week. She said it drained her energy.

One of my dearest friends, Pat, had gone through something similar. But now, after the recurrence, she was doing well, and all signs of the cancer were gone again. No permanent guarantees, but she is busy living her best life. We talked about “chemo brain,” and I told her Pat said it was real. She didn’t realize it until she was through with her own chemo and could feel how much better she was able to think. I hoped hearing about someone else who had been through something similar would encourage her. I offered to put her in touch with Pat in case she had any questions.

They had met Pat’s daughter when she visited Japan. Our daughter, Kim, had come over with Tracy (our goddaughter) when she was fourteen. She and Kim had a great time. Kim had come the year before with my mother, and she had learned how to get around on the trains. On this second trip, she was fearless!

I told them that Tracy was getting married, and they were very excited for her.

After a while, Misayo suggested we drive around our old neighborhood, so we did.

Our building looks pretty much the same, but another building has been built on the other side of our parking structure. A big building now stands farther up the hill. And yet another new building is being built beyond the new one next to ours. The area is growing.

Many familiar places are gone, replaced by newer and more modern structures. The little strip mall and the post office remain, but most of the stores have changed. The Co-op where we shopped is still there.

We went on to Kiyoshikojin Seichoji Temple, the local shrine, where we had gone often.

The Saturday before we left for Japan, our church (Community Presbyterian of San Juan Capistrano) had a one-day women’s retreat. We had just installed a gorgeous labyrinth, and the retreat focused on it. We were given quite a few options on how we wanted to approach it, and the event ended with each of us walking the labyrinth. I had been very moved by the experience.

Being back at the temple gave me the same peaceful feeling I’d had after walking the labyrinth.

As we entered, it looked much like it had the first time we’d gone when we took my mother. Just like that time, the sakura (cherry blossoms) were in bloom. I looked at the same beautiful tree under which Mom had sat in her wheelchair, and the memory was very sweet. (We had borrowed the chair to make it easier for her to go some of the places we wanted her to see. This was one of them.)

We went up the hill to the main shrine, where we washed our hands and purified our mouths using the long-handled bamboo cups. Then we approached the shrine itself and threw a coin as an offering. We bowed twice, clapped twice, and bowed once again. Then we prayed silently. Mine was for healing for Kazue.

This temple has several shrines, so we went on to a few others and stopped to pray at each one.

Along the way, Kazue, Misayo, and I cast sticks for our luck. We received them on a slip of paper. I got the best one as did Misayo. All of our prayers and wishes would come true. Kazue’s was a bit different. She would get her desires, but they would take some time. I remembered what Larry had felt when Pat asked him to pray about her cancer. He said he felt she would fully recover, but it would take time, and it would be a hard journey. It’s exactly what happened. This felt like an echo of that moment.

At one place along the way, there was sand piled around a tree. It stood in in a sort of wrought iron cage. We were told if you uncovered five coins buried in the sand with the long stick provided, you would have good luck. You were to take them home, and when your wish was granted, you returned them back to the sand to bless someone else.

Larry found three immediately, but he didn't want to take them with him, since he would not be there to return them. However, Misayo-san uncovered one and gave it to him for good luck. He put it in his pocket.

A few of the altars (shrines?) were up lots of stairs (very Japanese!), and I declined to climb them. (My knees were doing very well, but I didn’t want to press my luck. I had gotten shots in my bad knee not long before we left home.) So, we walked around the grounds on the level area and waited for the others.

I had amazing moments of pure Zen while taking in the peace and beauty of the place. The sound of a gentle stream running downhill. The breeze blowing through the trees. The glimpse of a small but perfect garden through an open gate. Every glance held a photo opportunity, which I simply enjoyed without having to capture it. I knew they were etched in my memory.

We sat in the shade while the other three finished making all the rounds. Then we started to leave.

But Larry suddenly went back to the last shrine. We watched him toss his coin of offering, bow, clap, and bow his head.

I turned to Kazue. "He is saying a prayer for you." I don’t know how I knew, but I was sure.

When we got back home to California, I finally asked him about it. He said he just knew that was where his "lucky coin" from Misayo was supposed to be because the luck only works when you give it away. He loves this family as much as I do.

On the way back, we stopped at the Hankyu Takarazuka station for something to drink. It was still filled with shops of all kinds. I remembered taking my mother to a little English tea house there, but I thought it was long gone. However, it was still there after all these years.

There were quite a few people waiting, so Kazue suggested going to the new Takarazuka Hotel.

It is beautiful, very elegant, and brand new. Just off the lobby is a small dining area, where we found a table. I ordered a diet coke, and Misayo ordered a regular one. Larry, Kazue, and Takehiro ordered the sweet “set.” (This is what combos are called in Japan.) They each selected a dessert and coffee or tea.

Afternoon treat at the Hotel Takarazuka
Misayo, Larry, me, Kazue, Takehiro

We went back to their house and continued our reminiscences.

Just as when we had gone there with my mother and Kim years before, Misayo’s sakura tree was in bloom. We were assigned seats so that we could see the tree. Then Misayo brought over photos of her mother (whom I adored) and Akira. Both had passed away since we lived there, but she wanted them to share in our party.

She brought out the shabushabu pot and plugged it in. (Like sukiyaki, shabushabu is cooked at the table. Sukiyaki is cooked in a combination of shoyu or soy sauce, sake, and a little sugar. Shabushabu is cooked in water. Both include meat and lots of veggies.) Then she brought out platter after platter of food to be cooked.

Both are lovely ways to enjoy a meal. We each cooked our own food and truly enjoyed it. And all the time, we talked and laughed and remembered the good times we had shared.

Afterward, as she had each time we shared a meal at their house, Kazue sat down at her grand piano and played for us while we enjoyed the beauty of the tree outside of the window.

She played a Bach piece she said reminded her of the journey she was on. Afterward, I told her I could hear the tumult followed by slower, gentler sounds of rest and recovery. I understood why it spoke to her.

Then she played a lovely Dvořák piece. And she finished, as she had started on the evening we shared with Mom and Kim, with a “Fantasia on Sakura.” Toshi and Kae had also been with us that night, and this experience echoed that long ago evening. Now Kae was gone, but we would see Toshi in a couple of days when he joined us in Osaka.

All too soon, it was time for us to leave. Takehiro said he would drive us back to our hotel. We could have taken the train, but he insisted. Kazue came with us. They went out to bring the car to the door. Larry and I put on our shoes, and he went out to wait for the younger folks.

Misayo and I were left inside.

We hugged tightly, and she began to sob. I wept as well and held her close. I felt her sadness was more than just for our parting once again. I’d watched her being brave and confident for Kazue, but in that moment, being held by a friend, she was willing to let her anxiety show. Our embrace lasted a long while.

When we finally parted, I told her I loved her, and she said the same, although the words really weren’t necessary. Once more, our hearts connected in the same way they always have.

Just like when we left Japan for the last time as we returned home, Misayo did not want to go with us to the hotel. So, we said our farewells there.

Takehiro drove us right to the hotel, and we hugged Kazue and him goodbye.

It was a day full to the brim with blessings yet heartbreaking at the same time. It has taken me some time to process it, and I’m sure it will stay with me for a long while.

USJ 25th Anniversary – Part 3 - Japanese Breakfast

 

March 28, 2026

For the last ten years or so, Larry has requested we only stay in hotels that serve breakfast. (We became spoiled when we started staying at Hampton Inns with their breakfast buffet included. Domestically, they became our hotels of choice.)

We have stayed at the Hotel Universal Port each time we return to Japan, and we always opt to add the breakfast buffet. It’s Larry’s kind of meal. Lots of small tastes of a bunch of different foods. And the best part is the cappuccino machine!

Since they moved our room to the top floor (ocean view, not park view), we discovered we also got some great perks.

I need to thank the Room Support clerk, Setsuko Washio, who made it all happen and for going far out of her way to make sure we were satisfied. She kept checking in with us to be sure we were enjoying our stay.

And she gave us a sweet card and 25th anniversary sticker from the hotel.

Being on the top floor meant we got special blue ticket for breakfast. Like fast-passes or lightning lanes, they allowed us to bypass the regular (LONG) lines at the entrance and get seated first.

Then, we were escorted to a special, separate dining area. I always request to be seated where we could see the children in the main area. I love watching their enthusiasm as they anticipate a day in the park. The last time, we saw more kids in Harry Potter robes and Mario hats. Fewer were in costume this time, but their excitement was no less palpable.

Not only did we have reserved seating, but each day we received a special “treat” with our meal.

The plates were side plates, and the tiny cups were the size of egg cups, but the fruit was fresh as was the tiny mint leaf, and the fork was about the size of a cocktail fork. Fresh strawberries are expensive, so this was truly a lovely surprise. (They looked exactly the same every day.)

The other perk of being on the top floor was coupons for free drinks in a couple of the hotel lounges. Since we don’t drink, we thought we wouldn’t use them, but several of our Japanese kids came to visit us, and we went there to eat with them. They enjoyed the free drinks!

We always started breakfast with a cup of cappuccino to wake up.

Then we picked up a tray and added one of the smaller serving trays for our food. (They are half the length of the tray and fit across the width. They are sort of like egg cartons with six shallow indentations. They only hold a small amount in each one. So, you can try many options.

There are numerous food stations featuring Japanese, Chinese, American, and other specialties. There is also a kid’s station with special minion-themed dishes for them to eat from. Their section has (among other things) a choice of cereals and toppings—including soft serve ice cream. Larry started a bit of a trend by finishing his meal each day with it. He noticed several other adults followed suit. (He’s a trend-setter.)

My favorite area was the yogurt and smoothie bar. It always had plain yogurt and usually plain yogurt with chia seeds. (I might start keeping it on hand at home since it was good.) They provided small bowls (the same size as the coffee cups) for the yogurt and featured chunks of apple, pineapple, and other fruit. One day, they had fresh raspberries and Japanese blueberries (much smaller than ours, but tasty). Then there were toppings: passion fruit and mixed fruit. Yummy.

The smoothies were usually banana and mango, a berry mix, and green juice. We went for the fruit.

Many items were cooked fresh on the spot. Fried chunks of fish were being cooked at all times, and when a batch was finished, they beat on a drum as notification. Fresh Japanese “omelets” (hard cooked scrambled eggs spread thin and cooked in sheets, then rolled and cut into small bite-sized slices) were announced with a bell.

Larry usually selected the undercooked scrambled eggs. I preferred to choose a whole egg, formed in a perfect circle, which just fit into one of the indents in the serving tray. They made them over-easy, over-hard, and sunny-side-up.

I also liked the fried potato wedges. Larry usually got the tiny patty of shredded potato, sort-of-like McDonald’s mini-hashbrown patties. (I tried them once, but they were cold.)

He always tried a variety of the Asian choices, most of which I didn’t recognize. I pretty much stuck to western foods, and not much of any of them.

Many choices were provided, including undercooked bacon and unsmoked sausage. The undercooked scrambled eggs are in the red container, and the potato wedges are in the yellow one. The rest of the eggs, etc. are around the corner.

They provided a selection of breads and sweet rolls, too. Tiny croissants, small fruit-filled pastries, and bread for toasting were featured. A couple of days, they had miniature waffles, about the size of a quarter of a Belgian waffle, with one edge dipped in icing. Of course, we tried these.

We had to guard against eating too much, but everything was delicious!

We always finished our meals with a final cup of cappuccino while we watched the people enjoying themselves.

On the first morning, as I got my cappuccino, I spotted a little guy in a highchair. He had his stuffed purple paradactyl with him. He was ignoring his breakfast while he “flew” it around the table and placed it on his head. He made me smile.

Another day, a tiny boy, also in a highchair, smiled and giggled and flirted with me. I waved, and he laughed.

And Minion Bob greeted us as we left.

It was altogether a lovely way to start each day.

USJ 25th Anniversary – Part 2 - On the Road Again

March 26, 2026

The alarm went off at 6:00 a.m., but we were awake over an hour earlier. We decided to get up. Showered, dressed, stripped the bed, put out fresh sheets so the cleaner could remake the bed, and finished packing. (The cleaner was scheduled to come the day we arrived home.)

We had a quick cup of coffee and split a protein drink. Then we finished picking up, emptying the trash, and walking through the house closing windows and making sure everything was put away.

Our driver, Chris, (Christopher’s Car Service 949-870-7273) arrived at 9:00 as scheduled. Our flight didn’t depart until 2:20 p.m., but we had heard horror stories about delays at airports across the country due to the government shutdown and TSA not being paid. So, we wanted to get there extra early.

Since COVID, there are no airport shuttles from South Orange County to LAX. We used another service two years ago and were happy with them, but we decided to try Chris for this trip. He was great!

It was a quick drive to the airport. Not much traffic. Despite rush hour, we got there in just over an hour.

JAL has a direct flight from LAX to Kansai (KIX). The other airlines require a transfer. We took this same flight two years ago and loved it. We usually travel with one small rolling bag that fits in the overhead and one additional bag to go under the seat in front. Larry has a backpack, and I take a canvas bag. It holds my purse, computer, Kindle Fire, noise-reducing headset, neck pillow, and other items.

Our tickets included two checked bags at no additional cost. However, one each was more than sufficient.

We needed the extra space because we had to pack copies of our book, 31 Months in Japan: The Building of a Theme Park and omiyage (a souvenir brought for loved ones and close friends).

We took ten paperback copies of the book. On previous trips we had taken a few, and there was always more demand than copies. Larry packed five, and I packed five. (We sold two and gave away four. We brought home four.)

Omiyage is always a challenge. When we were living there, we usually brought back Universal-branded items for our friends and translators. Easy. This time, I got scarves for several of the “girls,” but they wouldn’t work for everyone.

I found some lovely and special small candles made by ScentsAbility before Christmas. I bought ten small ones for Christmas stocking stuffers, etc. However, they didn’t arrive until early February. This is a terrific nonprofit organization. You can read about them on their website. They were featured on the Today show, and I loved the whole concept. Besides, their candles smell wonderful!

I decided they would make nice little gifts, even though they added some weight. (But remember, we had lot of extra suitcase space.) I ordered some small scarves in Universal blue and some ½” white ribbon to tie them.

Then my sister-in-love mentioned that Trader Joe’s tote bags were considered stylish in Asia. A friend of hers had taken a few to the Philippines recently, and they were quite popular.

We checked all the local Trader Joe’s and were told the same thing. They come in without notice, and they sell out within a day when they do get them. Our local stores had none. Fortunately, I found some online. They were more than Trader Joe’s price, but definitely doable. I took eight of them plus tissue to fill them.

So, I had bags for the scarves and candles, and extra candles for others. I breathed a sigh of relief! They were a great hit. (BTW, several of the gals said they were considered like Gucci there.)

We checked in for our flight, got our boarding passes, and checked our two bags. I was scared about weight, but mine was only 35.5 pounds and Larry’s was under 30. Hooray!

Then on to Security. It may have been even faster than normal! We have TSA Pre-check, and there were few people in the line.

We went to our gate. (We like to get there early and would rather wait at the airport than wait at home.)

We had coffee and bagels while we waited.

JAL is nothing if not efficient. Boarding went smoothly. We like the seats in the rear on the sides with only two per row. More leg room and no climbing over other people to get to the bathroom. The only things we put in the overhead were our USJ team jackets. We always travel with them because we can have them cleaned and waterproofed. They came with the Universal Japan logo and our names on them. One of our team members located a shop that would add our names in Japanese (katakana) to match the English ones. Whenever we wear them in Japan, they get lots of notice.

We both put on our headphones, but I took my hearing aids out first. After a while, I knew they would hurt, and I could adjust the volume on my headset.

Since we would arrive in Osaka at 5:50 p.m., I wanted to stay awake throughout the flight so I could sleep when we arrived at the hotel.

I watched about 6 movies. Some I had wanted to see earlier. I was disappointed in a couple. So, I watched my current favorite, Rental Family, again. It got me in the right frame of mind for Japan, and I really like it.

We had a couple of meals on the plane. Always more than I can eat, so Larry picks what he likes of mine along with his.

This was the long flight (12 hours). While we flew, we crossed the International Date Line, so we lost a day and arrived on March 27^th.

March 27, 2026

We retrieved our bags and had our passports checked. (Our new ones have a bar code on the back. All we have to do now is scan the code and take a photo. They match us to the passport. Very quick and automated.) Customs was also quick and easy.

We had ordered a car service to take us to the hotel and had received confirmation before we left. We didn’t have to wait long for our driver to find us. We followed him outside and to the waiting car.

As we drove the familiar route to the hotel, we noticed many changes. Most of the industrial buildings are gone, replaced by modern structures. We saw much more English signage. But some places looked the same. As we approached the park, Larry recalled many trips on these roads, but now they are wider.

We arrived at our hotel, Hotel Universal Port. It is one of the original three hotels built just outside of the park. There are now quite a few others. It is the one we have always stayed at when we come back. It was originally the upscale luxury hotel—very fancy like the Ritz. However, they changed it to meet the needs of families. When we were there two year ago, it had been re-themed for the minions, and we loved it!

We had reserved a room with a queen-size bed. We got there after seven and gave them the reservation. They took us up to our room.

This is what we saw:

The beds (a queen next to two long twins shoved all together for a family) were on a raised platform about 6" tall), but they were set on the ground. I had just had shots in my knee and realized this wasn’t going to work! I was afraid if I ever got down into the bed, I would never be able to get up. And Larry would have been hard-pressed to get in on his side. Besides, the rocking horse and table were on the route to the bathroom. I could just see myself tripping over them in the middle of the night. (When you get old, you make trips during the night.)

The bathroom had an exceptionally deep tub like the one we had in our mansion in Japan. But we were 25 years younger then. It would have been a challenge today.

We went back down to the desk and explained why this just wouldn’t work.

They said there were no queen rooms left, but they found us a double (two twin beds pushed together). It was on the top floor. We discovered this was a decided perk! (More about that later.)

The bath in this room was just like the Japanese bath in our mansion. Our visitors will remember it. It is a wet room with a handheld shower and a tub. We could adjust the handheld so it could be used just like a standard shower. Success!

We had been up for over 24 hours are were tired. So, we went straight to bed. After all, we had busy days ahead.

USJ 25th Anniversary – Part 1 - Party or No Party?

Since March 31, 2026 would mark the 25^th anniversary of the opening of Universal Studios Japan, we wanted to get together in Osaka with other team members to celebrate.

Many changes have taken place in the past 25 years—including change of ownership. When we were there, a multi-national conglomerate (USJCo) owned the park. Today it is wholly owned by Universal Studios. Unfortunately, we were not able to get any help from them in any way.

All the people who planned the delayed 20^th anniversary party two years ago were too busy or out of the area and could not help us this time. I tried to make arrangements from here, but it proved impossible. So, I cancelled the event.

However, an angel named Atsuko Sera, Japanese born and bilingual, said she would see what she could do. She contacted the same hotel where the party had been held two years ago. They were willing to give us the same deal that we had then for the same price! (The only difference was that we had the room for two hours instead of three.) Fortunately, the exchange rate was much more favorable to us this time. The party was back on!

She and I coordinated the preparations and tracked the attendance. Two weeks before the event, we had 80 people who responded positively. This was the number we gave the hotel. (It was like a wedding reception where the number we locked in was the number we were responsible to pay for.)

Unfortunately, a war started two days afterward. Several people were stuck in places where they could not get a plane out. (One family was in Dubai, and the airport had been bombed.) Others were afraid to fly. A few had medical issues. We heard about long delays and cancelled flights at US airports. Still others just didn’t let us know their updates.

Fortunately, several who had not RSVPd were able to get to Osaka. We told them to come!

Sara-san (Atsuko) recruited a couple of friends to help with registration. She would be the MC for the event and do some of the translation. Fortunately, most of the speakers sent her their speeches for translation early!

It was a mad scramble, but we felt we were ready!

My Friend, Bernie Schwenck

How do you summarize a friendship of over fifty years? I have been wrestling with this for a couple of weeks. I still can’t figure it out, so I’ll start at the beginning.

We met Bernie when my mother-in-love bribed us to attending church with her. We had stopped going to church several years before. We had lived out of the state, and when we returned, our previous church was gone.

In the interim, Larry’s folks had purchased a mobile home in Dana Point. When we came back to California, we began to spend all our weekends there with them.

Mother’s birthday was May 6. A week or so before, she announced, ”All I want for my birthday and Mother’s Day is for my family to go to church with me.” So, we went.

That first week, we discovered that the pastor was a surfer. It was enough to get Larry to go back. The next time we went, the pastor’s wife greeted us by name! I later discovered she’d had the ability to really see and remember people from the time she was young. She never forgot a name. This was Bernie.

She was far from the stereotypical pastor’s wife. She didn’t play the piano or teach Sunday school classes. She sang in the choir, participated in Bible studies, and took part in women’s activities. She attended all the women’s retreats and contributed wisdom to all of them.

Schwenck family 1972

She didn’t look like a stereotypical pastor’s wife, either. Her long hair hung to her waist. She wore short skirts and knee boots—or whatever was comfortable. Since this was a “beach church,” people accepted her as she was, and she did the same. She always seemed to see the best in people.

The door to their house was never locked. Their friends and their children’s friends knew they could walk in at any time—and they did. Bernie’s only request was that if folks showed up and she was busy, they could either talk to her while she continued or they could help. And if she was watching a sporting event, guests were expected to join her. (They could cheer for the opposition, but she would cheer louder for UCLA or the Dodgers. And she would yell at the referees if she thought they made a bad call.)

Bernie had worked as a PE teacher and coached the cheerleading squad in New Jersey while Bob was attending Princeton Seminary. She had a real passion for sports, having been a cheerleader in high school and college. She never missed a game or sporting event for either of her children or her grandchildren.

Larry and Bob and our friend Diana Gardner (nicknamed “Gidget”) formed the Community Presbyterian Surf Team. They had great times surfing together, and Bob became Larry’s best friend.

After the Schwencks’ first trip to Hawaii, they became as hooked on the islands as we were. By this time, we had gone quite a few times and had visited all the islands (except Niihau). The four of us began to vacation together. In time, we traveled all over the world, and we always enjoyed spending time together.

We usually followed the same pattern. We would start planning a trip several months in advance when we discussed the details. Since I am somewhat of a control freak (an understatement), I usually made the arrangements for flights and hotels, etc. (unless they had miles or credit they could use to book their own). In our first meeting, however, each of us chose one thing to do on the upcoming trip. I usually selected something adventurous, like taking the helicopter flight over Kauai or visiting the leper colony on Molokai. Larry’s choice always involved surfing. Bob usually picked something fun, like bike riding down Mt. Haleakala on Maui. Bernie, however, always wanted to do the same thing: paddling the outriggers on Waikiki. She said, “This is the only place on earth where you can do this.” And she loved it.

Bernie 3rd from left

We all liked “funky” places to stay, and we always tried to save money. However, we found some incredible places where we returned on future trips. Fortunately, we had quite a few friends who lived in the islands, so when we were there, we tried to visit them. I have terrific memories of special adventures with dear friends.

Bernie always went along with whatever craziness I planned. She’d say, “I just want to go along and have fun.” The only other thing she wanted to do in Hawaii was spend time sunning on the beach. Because I am far too fair to spend much time in the sun, I either went shopping, or swam laps in the hotel pool, or read a book.

On one memorable trip in 1990, we were joined by our friends Don and Karen Seapy. Don always said it was his very favorite vacation. The highlight was the glider flight over Dillingham Airfield.

l-r: Larry, Bob, Bernie, Don, Lorna, Karen

When Bob did an exchange pulpit in Scotland, we stayed with him and Bernie and spent several days with them before we visited with my family and did a bit of sightseeing. When he did the same thing in New Zealand, we went to visit before exploring the country on our own. In both places, we met lovely people from his guest congregations, some of whom we are still in touch with.

We also traveled to places in the US together, and many of those trips resulted in great memories—like the Rainbow Motel, the very worst place we ever stayed. (Bob picked it.) Even the not-so-great experiences became shared legends and the sources of much laughter.

We visited Italy, Ireland, Australia, France, and other spots in the world with them. We never failed to enjoy our travels.

Through the years, Bernie and I cried together and laughed together and shared lots of love. We lost friends and loved ones and grieved together. We comforted each other and knew we could count on each other.

But, who do I count on now?

Bernie passed away on May 23 after a battle with Parkinson’s and a couple of strokes. It’s hard to believe that her vibrant spirit and contagious laugh and smile won’t be there for us anymore. There are so many things I will miss: hugs, and wisdom, shared silences and shared laughs, moments when no words are necessary, and moments of understanding.

I visited with her each of the three days before she passed and was able to tell her it was okay to let go. I assured her that Larry and I would be there for Bob and her family, and they would be okay because she helped to make them the strong, loving people they are. I prayed with her and told her I loved her. I assured her that I was certain her daughter Erin would be waiting along with her mother and other friends and family. And I assured her God would greet her with: “Well done, good and faithful servant.” I truly believe this.

But my dear friend left a huge hole in my life and that of the others who loved her.

After she passed, I did what I do. I helped Bob write her obituary and then created her obituary website: bit.ly/459dNMl

I also spoke at her memorial service and created the video: https://youtu.be/cSJoF6a4nfM

But these small things just can’t begin to capture who she was and what she meant to me and to those who loved her. I shall miss her for the rest of my life.

…And Still More

 Since May, eight of our friends have passed away besides Brooke Bailey, about whom I wrote about in May. (She died on the fifteenth.)

…And they just keep coming…

Bob Wille

Bob Wille

Sherry Derr-Wille and Bob

Bob was the husband of one of my writing partners. They had been married for just short of 60 years. He died on May 10.

Lynette Christy

Lynette

On June 26, we finally located her younger brother just to discovered she had died about six months ago. We’ve looked for her off and on for years. He told us she had married and moved to Ecuador—quite likely the reason we hadn’t been able to reach her. Larry and I and his best friend and Lynette double dated for a couple of years. Larry’s friend passed away in 2008. We had hoped to share this video of when we were all together with her. We sent it to her brother to show her son.  https://youtu.be/uKh4mhEqStM

Teri Atkinson

Teri

She was related to our great-niece, Savannah. Her mother died when she was eleven, and her grandmother died ten days later. Terri was like a surrogate grandmother to Savannah and a lovely lady. We shall miss her.  https://tinyurl.com/4vkkwh9m

Shaun Corrales

Shaun

Shaun was my cousin, Eileen’s oldest child and her only son. He passed away on May 22. He was only 55 years old. https://www.echovita.com/us/obituaries/ca/templeton/shaun-luis-corrales-19855537

Bernice Smith Schwenck

Bernie

Bernie passed away on May 23. I will write more about her separately.

Nelloise Blue

Nell

Nell passed away on June 27. She had been a member of our church for many, many years and was a loving and sweet friend to many of us.

Wendy Jenkins

Wendy

Wendy was a longtime friend and church member. She passed away today, July 10. She had an infectious smile and a wonderful sense of humor. (She always accused me of dying my hair!) She took a bad fall a couple of weeks ago. We visited her in the nursing home, and she was anxious to get back home. She did return, but then had a series of strokes. I shall miss her very much.

 

Far too many in a short time.

Another Loss…

 Losing those we love is always hard. We all expect our parents to die someday. If we are married, we assume one or the other of us will go first. And if we are blessed to live long enough, we will begin to lose close friends. However, what we do not expect is for young people to die suddenly.

I am currently helping to facilitate a GriefShare group , and several of the people in that group have lost children. I know I will never understand just how they feel, but I can’t imagine anything more wrenching.

About an hour after I returned home last Thursday, while scrolling through Facebook, a photo of a dear young lady we loved appeared. When I read the caption, I began to sob. Larry was sitting next to me and asked what was wrong. I was crying so hard I could hardly answer him. I managed to get out, “Brooke died.”

His answer was to be expected: “Huh?”

“Brooke died.”

This time, what I’d said finally registered, and I watched the pain on his face.

I cried for several hours…

~~~

Brooke’s mother, Arleen, was one of our daughter Kim’s best friends in high school. She spent hours with us, and Kim spent time at her house. As with many of Kim’s friends, we stayed in touch with Arleen through marriages, divorces and kids, mostly through email and then later through Facebook.

She finally met Jim, and her life became more stable. They had a daughter, Brooke.

Kim worked at Disneyland for several years, and Arleen and Brooke had passes. When she could, Kim met them there, and they enjoyed the park together.

I remember her telling us that Brooke’s favorite ride was The Haunted Mansion Holiday. Even though she was little, Brooke was never afraid. She loved Jack Skellington.

A few years ago, Arleen called us. She had a favor to ask. Brooke was enrolled in IPoly High School, located on the campus of Cal Poly, Pomona. Only the top students qualified, and Brooke was a terrific student. This program combined the usual high school curriculum along with college-level classes and self-directed learning.

Arleen explained that for her senior project, Brooke had to select a career she might be interested in pursuing and then find a mentor to work with her through the school year. The commitment was for fifty in-person hours plus emails and phone calls throughout the year. Arleen knew we were authors and that I was editing. Brooke decided she wanted to find out about this career, and Arleen asked if we would be willing to work with her. We did not hesitate to answer, “Yes!”

So, during the next eight months, her folks drove her down to our home in Dana Point from their home in San Gabriel Valley every few weeks so we could spend two or three hours with her while they went to the beach. (Fortunately, they both love the beach!)

Arleen, Brooke and Jim

We started with the basics: story structure, character development, world building, etc. We have an extensive collection of books on writing, and every time Brooke came, she went home with two or three. The next time, our visit started with a discussion of what she had learned from the books.

In October, I suggested she take part in NaNoWriMo: National Novel Writing Month. Participants commit to writing every day, completing a book within the month. I told her if she finished, we could edit it together and publish it. She was excited at the prospect.

Larry is a plotter, so he and Brooke discussed creating an outline ahead of time so she would know what her story was about and where it was going. (I, on the other hand, am a “pantser.” I write by the seat of my pants and let the story evolve through my characters.)

She started out enthusiastically, but about halfway through, she lost interest. She completed the book, but she said when she finished, she didn’t like it and didn’t want to publish it. We agreed the experience was still a good exercise.

I gave her a couple of chapters of a book I had edited and asked her to take a shot at it for practice. She brought it back, and we compared her notes with mine. She did a great job with it.

Larry completed his sci-fi book, The McGregor Chronicles: Book 3 - Alien Invasion, while we were working with Brooke and invited her to be a beta reader. She gave him several suggestions, which he included. And she is mentioned in the Acknowledgements. Her review is quoted in the Readers’ Comments section of the book.

Periodically, we had to log into her school portal to record the number of hours we’d spent and answer a few questions about what we had done. She did the same.

During one of our last sessions, she sat with me as I uploaded a manuscript I had edited and formatted for an older gentleman. I’d asked if I could call him during the process so I could explain what I was doing, and I asked his permission for Brooke to look on in real time so she could see the actual steps. As a former teacher, he was delighted to have her. She watched and asked questions of me and the author. It felt like it was the most valuable time we spent with her.

She had to produce a final project and chose to do an interactive PowerPoint for her class about what she had learned. She sent it to us ahead of her presentation, and we were impressed with her work. So was her teacher. I think she got an A+ grade on it.

Of course, we attended her graduation and cheered loudly along with her large family when she walked across the stage.

High School Graduation

She decided to take a gap year before starting college. During that year, the family moved from California to Florida.

She did return to college, where she graduated with honors and immediately started on her Masters degree. We expected to hear great things from her.

She was one class short of completing her degree when her mother found her in her bed last Thursday morning…

~~~

We are still processing the news, but we are also very grateful to have had Brooke in our lives. We came to love her very much. We have no grandchildren, but Brooke became like a grandchild.

Thank you, Brooke, for the sunshine and joy you gave to this world.

 

Thanks to her sister, Amber, and her godmother, Chris, for the photos.

This is a link to her obituary. https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/boca-raton-fl/brooke-bailey-12379068