Work Families

During my working years, I was blessed to work for several companies where the employees became like family.

In 1978, I went to work for CF Braun & Co. Larry had already been employed there for thirteen years at the time. For the first six months, I was on probation (standard at the time). I felt as though I had to prove myself worthy to work there.

Once I had passed the test, however, I could have stayed for as long as I wanted. Many employees had been there for forty years or more. I was a “lifer” and would have stayed until retirement. Except, it wasn’t an option. The company was sold twice. With each sale, they lost customers. I left because we didn’t feel it was prudent for both of us to be employed by the same company.

During my seven years there, many fellow employees became closer than family. (Larry worked for the company for over thirty years in several different iterations and owners.) Even after both of us left, we remained in touch. We are still close to most of them, and we have groups on both Facebook and LinkedIn where we continue to share information.

About ten years later, after we moed to Orange County, I went to work for HC Power, inc. Once again, joining a new company was not an easy transition, and I felt I had to prove myself. However, soon these fellow employees became like another family.

I left in 1998 to work for three years in Japan. During my absence, the company was sold to PowerOne. I was asked to return in 2002 when we came back from Osaka, and I felt right at home once again. However, about eight months after I returned, PowerOne announced they were moving the manufacturing offshore and closing their California facilities.

We were such a close group, for the first two years after the company closed, we met on the first Friday of each month after work—just because we missed each other. We have groups on Facebook and LinkedIn to keep in touch.

In January, we suddenly lost one “brother,” Mehron “Ron” Khatiblou. I had worked with him in Engineering. I was out of town on the day of his memorial service, so I was unable to attend.

His month, we lost another “brother,” Raul Valerio, my former boss, in a paragliding accident. Last Friday, the “family” joined his family and friends to celebrate his life. I loved seeing everyone but wished the occasion had been a happier one.

The next place I worked, Downey Savings and Loan, was another extended family. Once again, few people who worked there ever left. I was employed there for seven years.

I adored the people. However, at the end of 2008, the FDIC closed the company—another victim of the banking collapse. I stayed on until mid-2009 to help with the closure.

Once again, we continue stay in touch through Facebook and LinkedIn. We have gotten together several times, and we all still miss seeing our friends.

My last job was a contract for Parker Aerospace, a subsidiary of Parker Hannifin. And once again, I felt as though I were coming home to a family. Many employees had been with the company for forty years, and few people left.

Even though I was only there for one year, I felt as though I had been at home.

Some people are lucky enough to work for one of these kinds of companies. I was blessed to work for several, and I continue to be grateful to count former employees of these companies among my close friends.

Atta Girl

Yesterday, I was talking to my daughter, who is looking for a new job. In addition to the normal activities (update and re-post resume, network, hunt through Monster, Indeed, Career Builder, file for unemployment insurance, etc.), I told her to find all her previous good reviews, positive notes, emails, etc.

This idea came from our Chief Nuclear Engineer, Roger Moore. I did some work for him for a few months years ago when his secretary was out with an injury. He asked me to do some filing. A few of the items were marked “Atta Boy.” I asked him about it.

“Whenever I get a commendation or note of thanks, I file it in my Atta Boy file. Then, when I feel underappreciated, I take them out to remind myself of the things I have done well in the past.”

After I spoke to my daughter, I decided to look at my own file again.

I found the plaque I received as part of a team tasked with improvement to the company’s on-time delivery. Within a couple of months, we went from more than fifty percent of products delivered late to ninety-nine percent on-time or ahead-of-time.

Another company had a policy were anyone could write up an employee for outstanding performance. These were given to HR. A copy went into the person’s personnel file, and the original went to the person acknowledged. I kept three of them for various accomplishments.

I kept all of my performance reviews over the year, nearly all of which were above average or outstanding. In looking through them, I realize I’d forgotten I actually did some of these things.

In the file are several awards and certificates for service to our church.

In 1983, I was given the President’s Award for outstanding work in my department. Only twenty people, in a company of over 4,000 employees, were honored. (I left the company the following year. At the time of my exit interview, my boss told me I would have received another one.)

A rumor circulated about a “doomsday list.” This list was supposed to contain the names of those who were so valuable they would be retained until the doors closed. Although management denied its existence, at my exit interview, my boss confirmed I was on the list, and so was Larry.

I still keep the letter of recommendation from one boss. He left the company in 1987 but wanted to make sure I had a letter before he left. He told me to write it myself. When I brought it back to him the first time, he said it wasn’t complimentary enough. He gave me a few more sentences and told me to rewrite it. I did so. But he still wasn’t satisfied and added a few more superlatives. I used it when I applied for most of my subsequent positions.

But my very favorite thing in the file is a simple hand-written note from a corporate vice president regarding a cost estimate I had prepared for microfilming a project. In part, it says:

I just read your…estimate. Superb job! It reads well, it’s easy to follow, and it looks good on the page—short paragraphs, etc. It appears you also typed it. Can you crack walnuts with your feet?

It is followed by a star and his name. This was from a VP not known for his sense of humor, so I have always treasured it.

I hope my daughter has a similar collection. When changing jobs, it is easy to slip in to insecurity, but with an atta boy or atta girl file, it’s easier to remember accomplishments and awards.

Do you have a file like this? Do you intend to start one?

Lessons Learned

One of the great benefits of getting older is you actually learn stuff. Here are a few suggestions I made to a younger friend when she was frustrated in her job. I think they hold up pretty well.

GRATITUDE

Start every day by listing the things you’re thankful for. No matter how bad your situation, it always contains blessings. Find and acknowledge them. (Try the 30 Day Gratitude Challenge. Each day, list something you are grateful for. It’s a good way to start the day.)

Start your conversations with everyone at work by thanking them for something—verbally if possible, mentally if not. Don’t be fake about it, but each time you see someone, try to think of one thing you like about them, one thing they have done for you, one thing they’ve helped you with. Then say it—or at least think it. Take the time to do this before rushing into other conversation. It will change your perception as well as theirs.

Continue to pursue doing what you love—whether where you are now or not. What is your real passion? If this is the most important thing to you, you shouldn't have to hunt for time to do it. You’d make the time, and the work itself would renew and refresh you.

NO JOB IS PERFECT

Let me repeat: NO job is perfect. You’ll enjoy some more than others, but EVERY job has its issues. No boss is perfect either.

I vividly remember wanting to be a Department Head or VP early in my career. By the time I reached my early thirties, however, spending my days doing something I enjoyed made far more sense.

Everyone needs balance in their lives. Even if you have to put it on your calendar, start setting aside time to spend with friends. What is play for you? DO IT.

At least twice during my performance reviews I was told to lighten up. I was so intense and driven I made the people around me uncomfortable. I never expected as much from anyone else as I did from myself, but I didn’t suffer fools lightly—and it sometimes included the boss. I didn’t think I was conveying this, but I had to have been. Work became much more enjoyable when I really got to know the others around me as people. I recommend it.

NO ONE OWES YOU ANYTHING

Work is a bargain between you and your employer. No one in the organization is obligated to help you in any way. If some do, consider it a bonus. But don’t carry any false expectations about how far or how much they can or will do. They are each fighting for their own positions. Particularly in a failing department or division, those from the top down are fearful for their own spots. And they probably know quite a bit more about what’s going on behind the scenes than they can or will tell you.

Get your expectations in check. Do the best job you can, given the resources and authority you are allowed. YOU ARE NOT IN CHARGE. Others are. And they make the decisions. Work as well as you can within those parameters.

Do what you are asked to do, and do it well. But don’t take on responsibility or expect to receive kudos for stepping on toes to take on more. Always try to make your boss look better, even if she is a real jerk. It will pay off in the long run.

BE STILL

Psalm 46:10: “Be still and know that I am God” has haunted me for years. I am woefully short on patience. I want to act and get things done NOW. The truth is control is an illusion. We can only do what is in our sphere to do. But we can’t control the outcome.

It’s a hard lesson and one I don’t always totally embrace. (I’m getting better about waiting, but I still don’t like it.)

Maybe your next position isn’t even available yet. Maybe you have to be at the nadir in order to accept the next offer. And it won’t be perfect either.

I can promise you this. Ten or twenty years from now, you will look back at your current place and say, “Oh, now I get it. This was what I needed to learn.” Or “I can see now I was being prepared for something better.”

What life lessons have you learned? Can they be helpful to others?

New Job Anxiety

I had a long conversation with my daughter the other day about her new job. She’s working for the same company, but they recently transferred her group into a new area—with new responsibilities. And little or no training.

The employees were given a checklist and told to follow it. However, the checklist continued to change—once three times in the same day. And they were provided no details about what had changed—or why.

When her rating came out at the end of last week, many of her cases had errors. She is a lot like her mother—a perfectionist/overachiever. She’s used to being the go-to person in the group and getting high ratings on her work. She is not used to errors, especially since she’d done a conscientious job and tried to follow the checklists exactly. She was devastated.

Her boss called a meeting of the group to talk about their performance—or lack of same. Turns out, all of them had errors, many had more than my daughter. However, that realization didn’t make her feel much better.

Years ago, I hired many entry-level people. I trained them, and then other departments ‘stole’ them for better positions. Therefore, I was continually replacing personnel, since I had twenty-six in my group.

Even though I thoroughly trained each one, occasionally I found an overachiever who expected to be perfect after the first week or two. When it didn’t happen, they panicked.

I developed this standard ‘timeline’ for a new job, which I shared with my employees and my daughter. You may also find it useful.

WEEK ONE

You are in training. It’s interesting (or not), and your expectation is that you don’t know it all yet. Same for week two.

WEEK THREE

You are starting to get into the groove and feel as though you really understand how to do the job. (This is about where my daughter was last week.)

WEEK FOUR

Reality crashes in. You discover you’ve made mistakes. For the hyper-conscientious, this is the point where you start to think, “I’ll never get it! I don’t even understand the terminology. There’s no one else to go to since we’re all busy.” This feeling is exacerbated if the training was insufficient or non-existent.

At this point, hunker down and hang in. Several of my employees attempted to quit when they reached this stage because they felt overwhelmed. I talked them into staying for just two more weeks. That was all I asked for.

At the end of two more weeks, they had started to really understand the job and develop some proficiency. From then on, their progress continued, not necessarily swiftly but consistently.

Many went on to better positions, and I started the training process again.

I can remember passing this insight on to a friend who had reached the point of giving up. She has now been in her position for about twenty years. I also had to talk my brother into staying with what turned out to be the best job he ever had.

So if you are starting a new job, just remember this timeline. During the last few years I worked, I was hired on contracts and had to remind myself of this reality with each new position I accepted. I got through the rough times with all of them to perform at my accustomed level of proficiency.

Do you have any other pieces of wisdom for folks staring a new job? Would you be willing to share them?