I Don’t Like Halloween

 Please don’t hate me, but I don’t like Halloween. I never did. I don’t like to be scared. I don’t enjoy masks and costumes. And I really don’t like clowns!

I love Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Easter. But Halloween is different. It is intended to frighten.

When I was little, my mom made all of my costumes.

The first one was when I was twenty-six months old. My grandfather had just passed away, so she and my grandmother pinned a sheet around my neck. I think I look frightened in the photo.

One of my favorites was Little Bo Peep. I adored that one. It was pretty, and I got to carry my stuffed lamb. The “staff” was made from my great-grandfather’s cane, wrapped in crepe paper.

Another year, Mom took an old wine velvet dress of hers and made it into a princess costume. My dad painted a pair of my shoes in gold and made me a crown. I rather liked it.

When I got to grammar school, Mom made us several different simple costumes. One I remember was a graduate. She used a cotton blouse for a robe and made a “mortarboard” from cardboard and crepe paper.

I often forget how creative Mom was.

We always had a carnival at school, and they were fun. They weren’t meant to be scary. They featured games and contests. I remember the dunking machine. The older boys all wanted to sit on the seat so other boys (nearly all of those who tried to dunk them were also boys) could throw a baseball at a lever. If they hit it hard enough, the person on the seat would fall off into a tank of water.

A teacher or other staff member would take a turn during the day. Whoever the “mystery guest” was that year was the favorite target. I especially remember when the principal took a turn. He was a real surprise since he always seemed very formal and proper.

When Kim was little, I made her costumes as well.

The Halloween she was one, I made her an angel outfit. Her friend, Matt, who was a month younger, was dressed as a devil. He carried a pitchfork. Kim carried her halo, which she refused to wear.

A couple of years later, she was a bride. Once again, I fashioned her costume—this time from a set of curtains.

Next, she was a witch. (The hat and wig reappeared several more times in later years.)

When the TV show Isis was popular, Kim and her best friend, Cheryl wanted to be the superhero. So, Cheryl’s mom and I made the girls these outfits.

Later on, she and her work team were dalmatians. They wore hooded white one-piece pajamas, painted with black spots. These were really cute.

Okay, so I enjoy the cute and pretty costumes. I just don’t appreciate the scary ones.

Oh, and I do miss seeing the kids in their costumes. Most parents don’t let their little ones go from door to door anymore. Churches now have trunk-or-treat events. And many malls have trick-or-treating. I can totally understand parents’ reluctance to have their children visit neighbors, who may well be strangers. We have very few kids in our neighborhood. But I miss seeing the little ones.

Once Halloween is over, I look forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas. I’ll start playing holiday music next week!

Is Aging a Crime?

 Today, my friend and fellow writer, Janet Greger (J. L. Greger) is my guest writing about aging. Lorna

Sometimes those of us over fifty feel like it’s a crime to look our age. Characters (at least positive ones) in movies, TV shows, and ads are all young, fit, and beautiful.

 One result of this hype is sales of anti-aging products have soared worldwide. Sales of these products in the U.S. alone is estimated to be about $12 billion annually.

 Not surprisingly, mislabeling and false claims for these products are also rampant. That is criminal.

One of the products being widely advertised now is BOTOX. Injections of botulinum toxin drugs, like BOTOX are effective in reducing the signs of aging (i.e. reducing crow’s feet around the eyes, laugh lines, and wrinkles on the brow). However, many doubt the wisdom of—but not the profits from—BOTOX parties. At these events, women receive injections of botulinum toxin at multiple sites in a party environment in someone’s home with plenty of food and alcohol. Nevada has now banned these at-home parties. Many states require that injections at these parties be made by a physician or nurse. However, basic safety requirements are difficult to maintain at these events.

 In the U.S., the FDA is the chief agency monitoring the safety of cosmetic products and assessing the veracity of the claims. Most Americans don’t realize the FDA can not only fine but also incarcerate manufacturers and spa/store owners who knowingly produce, advertise and sell dangerous or mislabeled items.

 The current situation could be described this way: those who try to make the public believe it is a crime to look old are sometimes committing crimes themselves. This is a basic premise in my new mystery.

In FAIR COMPROMISES, twenty residents in New Mexico come into clinics and doctors’ offices complaining of double or blurred vision, sagging eyelids, and headaches the day after a political rally. Public health workers quickly hypothesize the cause was botulism toxin in improperly home canned food served at the rally. Unfortunately, one individual’s symptoms are much more severe. If her muscle paralysis continues unchecked, she will die. New Mexico health officials contact the FBI because this patient is a candidate for the U.S. Senate, and they fear she may have been targeted.

 The mystery turns from being the analysis of a severe food safety breach to the investigation of a diabolical murder attempt using “cosmetic” botulism toxin when scientist Sara Almquist, with the help of a talented FBI lab crew, discovers a more sinister source of the toxin at a spa in Santa Fe. FDA officials then help the FBI solve this case and seek justice for the victims.

FAIR COMPROMISES has a message: It’s not a crime to show your age, and the relentless search for youthful beauty can be dangerous.

 Now you’re ready for some fun. Read FAIR COMPROMISES and see what happens to a politician who tried too hard to look young.

Sara Almquist and her FBI colleagues rush to find who endangered the lives of a hundreds at a political rally by poisoning the food with botulism toxin. The poisoners’ target was a woman candidate for the U.S. Senate; the rest were just collateral damage. As these agents track clues from a veterans’ hall in Clovis to health spas of Santa Fe, they must make a multitude of personal and professional (perhaps too many) compromises.

 

J.L. Greger is a scientist turned novelist. She includes science and international travel in her award-winning mysteries and thrillers: The Flu Is Coming, Games for Couples; Dirty Holy Water, Fair Compromises, and seven others. https://www.jlgreger.com